2024 is going to be my year. No, my beloved Warriors are not a certainty to win the NRL Grand Final, but I’ll be expecting them to go close. No again, I’m not expecting to come into a great deal of money, so I’m looking forward to a change of government in the hope the new crowd will increase my government super so I can afford petrol to go fishing. Once again no, I’m not expecting to appear in the New Year’s honours list for financial contributions to fishing tackle companies, breweries, or any other bloody thing.
In 2024, I am as positive as I have ever been finally, after close to 50 years of trying and failing dismally, I am going to be named as the recipient of the Husband of the Year award. Why am I so confident? When I tell you you’ll understand. Lynne the
Ruthless has a brother still living in Darwin. Next year his son is getting married and naturally we have been invited but wait. Red flags initially started waving when I saw the wedding was in May.
For one, Darwin is bloody hot that time of year but that’s bearable. What’s not and what also came very close to causing a major between me and the Ruthless is her nephew has gone and booked his bloody wedding for the eleventh. I didn’t need a calculator to work out that was seven days after the opening of duck shooting and when I’m still practically living in the maimai.
When I asked the Ruthless what the bloody hell he was thinking and informed her there was absolutely no way I was going, it went over like a cup of cold sick and that’s
when the afore mentioned major nearly started. I won’t detail the negotiations we’ve gone through but being the sensitive, understanding, even tempered loving person I am, it appears I’m going to be in Darwin on the eleventh, right in the thick of duck shooting.
That is why I am without any doubt in the box seat to win the 2024 Husband of the Year Award. I’m sure all blokes and any fair-minded females reading this will agree I deserve it.
With the serious issues out of the way I suppose we should have a quick look at what’s going to happen on October 14. I’ll come out right now and say I’m shit scared of a Labour/Green/Te Pati Māori coalition. I would imagine Labour aren’t super keen on this arrangement either but if it gets them into power for a further three years, they’ll grab it with both hands.
Too much damage has been done to the country we all love no matter what colour we are for this to be allowed to happen. Things must change from race relations to law and order, they must. Some will no doubt call me racist, I’m not. I do not live in a gated community in a flash part of town in fact, I have not had a non-Maori neighbour for over 25 years. I just want a fair deal for all and for us all to be safe. That’s not happening now.
Catch you next month.
